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Life can move so fast these days. I’ve often felt in my own life that I’m on a conveyor belt that just seems to get faster and faster.

Sometimes this is just the way life is, but sometimes it’s the way we let it be. I’ve noticed in these times that we can miss out on so much, especially the feelings that are inextricably linked to what is going on around us. I know from personal experience the need to continually check-in, re-evaluate and adjust my life in order to become (and stay) more deeply connected to myself and my world. One of the amazing tools I use to do this is Mindfulness.

Mindfulness is all about learning to become more present and aware. It can help you in so many areas of your life – in calming the mind and relaxing the body, managing stress and anxiety, developing self-esteem and promoting self-awareness. Mindfulness meditation is learning to let go and be present. It takes practice. Used properly, in conjunction with therapy, it leads to a clearer mind and a tranquil heart.

My blog posts are not going to be in any order. I spent a lot of my early life trying to do things in order – trying to work out the right order, the right way my life should (I thought) transpire. I learnt when I hit a reality check-point in my twenties that life does not always work out according to an ordered plan. Plans sometimes fail and life surprises you with unexpected twists and blows. My reality check came as a slap in the face which woke me up, just a bit. I say ‘a bit’ as it is years later writing this today that I feel more awake than I ever knew possible.

Life hasn’t turned out the ordered way I expected and anticipated it would, but life can be both messy and happy. Happiness comes now, not from controlling my circumstances to meet someone’s expectations or to avoid suffering, but from a deep-rooted place from within, that I hadn’t previously known was there.

Each of us goes through different, messy things in life that cause us pain and suffering and that are hard to explain. I believe that no-one’s pain and suffering is greater or lesser than anyone else’s. Our individual suffering should never be compared on a scale as it is unique to each of us. As a therapist, it can be a difficult and moving privilege to see clients feel and touch their pain. I consider it a great honour to walk with another person on their  journey to understand and heal from it – to know the messy pain of life and to find happiness in spite of it.

Last Christmas, I noticed so many interesting nail styles – all different, but all beautiful – from the plain, thick and opulent, to the long, delicate and festively sparkly. Upon finding out the cost and care each variety demanded, I was reminded of the amount of time and money that so many of us spend on making sure we look great on the outside. Now, I don’t doubt that when we look great, we can feel great too. But I wonder if we take as much care of our innerselves as we do our outer selves. Do we even realise how much we really need to take care of ourselves within? After years of study and work on this, I have seen for myself how taking better care of the inner-me has led to more joy in my life. As I commit to a lifetime of future learning, I also recognise that there is more joy to be found, as I continue to take time to look after myself. My hope is that through engaging with therapy, more people will search inwardly for understanding, be able to work on self-care skills and learn how much more they can benefit in their everyday lives. Over the coming weeks, I will post a series of short pieces about what therapy is, how to go about choosing your therapist, different approaches within therapy, coping skills, and much more. I hope you will enjoy these and find them helpful. Please let me know if you have any thoughts, questions or topics you would like to know more about.